Sorry, Not Sorry, But This Is My Life Right Now

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I’m sorry, not sorry guys.  Seriously, this is my life right now.

I’m sorry, not sorry that I completely forgot to dress my kid up for Red Ribbon week.  I did get the flyer.  And yes, I did read it.  But that flyer most likely ended up in a pile on my kitchen countertop that I will get to at some point before 2020.

anaheim moms blogI’m sorry, not sorry that I haven’t washed my hair in four days.  

I know it’s gross.  And I know I need to wash it – but I just don’t have the energy to dry it.  And let’s be real.  At the end of the looooooong day all I want to do is sit and watch some OC Housewives.  Because at least their drama isn’t about anything I did or didn’t do.

I’m sorry, not sorry that we had frozen pizza for dinner, again.

I know it’s not the healthiest, and I KNOW it’s not the tastiest, but that’s what happens when I forget to take the chicken out to thaw.  Because if I don’t do it, no one will.

I’m sorry, not sorry that my car is a landfill.  No, seriously my car got broken into a couple weeks ago and I can totally tell that the thief gave up.  Full on just took a hard pass at my car.  And I don’t blame him – it’s likely there are unknown creatures growing in there.

But seriously.  This is my life!

My life is not my own.  My life revolves around a few other people, some of whom I created.  Which is definitely not what I thought life would look like when I was 34.  But here I am.

So, in a way I am sorry.  

Believe me, I wish I was more on top of it.  I wish my kids were bathed more often.  And I really REALLY wish my car wasn’t a disgusting science experiment.  

I’m sorry I don’t get to talk to my friends as much and I’m really sorry when I completely forget about the plans we’ve made.  Trust me, it’s not you it’s ME!

But, I also am not sorry.

See, there are days when I am running full steam ahead.  I’ve got my checklist and it’s being checked, checked and triple checked.  

And then there are days when everything implodes and I spend two hours holding my son as he naps (while I conveniently watch OC Housewives).  Because, life right?

It’s like the more I try to control everything the more my little minions are like oh just TRY that mom and also the Universe is like laughing hysterically at me.

So yeah, I’m not sorry.  This is my life, this is where I’m at.  I’m rounding third and heading for home – just hoping I don’t get called OUT at the end of each day.  I’m as real as they come and I don’t mind sharing my realness with you.  Some call it TMI or lazy, I call it authentic.  Has a better ring, right?

Wherever you are on your motherhood journey, just stop being sorry for where you are at.  You are right where you are supposed to be.  And trust me, someday that car will be clean.  At least that’s what I’ve been told.  So far, there is no evidence to back that up.